Friday, April 22, 2011

Tyra and ALT

I can't handle. 

So here's the deal. This is a little mini post. I saw this video this morning and couldn't help but comment on it.

Tyra kills me. I cannot stand her. She is like a 11 year old middle child who is constantly annoying in order to garner any attention at all. Like for instance, Ty, I don't care about your show which isn't really on tv, nor do I really care about America's Next Top Model because well, it is boring and the girls are dumb and there's just a little too much "FABULOOOOSSSSSIIIIITTTTTTTTYYYYYYYY" for my taste. And you aren't french, Ty, so let's give up the sometimes accent. And also when imitating French or Italian designers, it is best to use at least a European accent and not descend into the Middle Eastern territories.

Andre Leon, you will always hold a special place in my heart, buuut come on with that cape. I felt like I wanted someone to get behind you and cut your hair and then take it off. Next time, at least a few bedazzles would be acceptable and desired.


Thursday, April 21, 2011

Wawa on Passover

Good Morning Darlings,

First of all, I'm sorry for being MIA for the past few days. I have been busy with passover and extended family and cooking and going to the orthopedic surgeon (btw, my kneecap is loose and apparently I have to strengthen my quad muscles, which if you have ever seen my legs is pretty ridic, because I have as my loving husband calls them, legs of steel. {not really what you imagine growing up} and I'm not supposed to wear high heels, which obviously is not going to happen.)

In the interim a few things have happened, I ate a turkey hoagie from wawa yesterday and I felt guilty about it before, during, and after. You see, I don't keep kosher at all during the year. The idea of not being able to eat lobster or cured spanish meats really upsets me and I happen to believe that the whole thing is rather Archaic...but I understand why people do it. It's just not for me. But usually I do keep kosher during passover and don't eat bread or cured meats or lobster. But it's a week and if I can be a vegan for a week, I can surely be kosher for a week. If you want to read more about being kosher for passover in simpler terms, you can click here:

But in general, I love passover food. I think my favourite thing on passover is gefilte fish. I actually eat it all year round, but most people think that this is very strange. Yesterday  I was on the phone with my bff (whilst having the most difficult time one could have at the Wawa electronic kiosk. Who knew there were so many options these days? NO  I do not want a "prime rib sandwich" from Wawa. Wawa should really stick to what it knows...turkey hoagies during the day and cheese and mayo hoagies with a side of blue jello squares at 2 am) he thought that it was really strange that I love gefilte fish so much. I don't understand why he would think that. I mean, I like a lot of weird foods, and I guess I take for granted that most people already know that.

This has got to be from the Martha Stewart Passover Special

Oh, Gentile friend, what is that you say? You don't know what Gefilte fish is? Well, let me enlighten you. Essentially, gefilte fish is fish sausage. It is ground fish (Pike, whitefish, and/or carp usually) mixed with matzoh meal and eggs seasoned with either sugar or salt (this is a long story that my bubby used to tell and to be honest I don't really remember but I'm sure it had something to do with the old country). It is traditionally eaten with aspic, a cooked carrot (ugh, one of my least favourite foods) and horseradish (!!!). My bubby and my grandmother's mothers both used to make it from scratch with live fish. I have heard so many stories about fish swimming in the bathtub on the days before Passover that I could probably write a 13 episode sitcom about it. Back in those days (you know which days I'm talking about, the good old ones), the women not only cooked, but butchered as well. I happen to love butchering and although I have never been hunting, I look forward to the day that I can actually hunt, kill, dress, and cook something. However, I'm not sure I would want to be around myself with a gun...just yesterday I got my ipod stuck in my hair (ugh the lioness roars) and it fell to the ground and smashed. So, a gun would probably create even more dreadful results if it got stuck in the mane. Anyway, these days (the not so good old ones) you usually buy gefilte fish in a jar or a can from the kosher aisle of the supermarket and the cashier always gives you a look of disgust when you purchase it. It's kind of like a fishy fruitcake. People either love it or they hate it. And let me tell you what, at least gefilte fish doesn't have those weird green cherries in it...although it could be an interesting experiment to mix the two.

Go out and buy some and try it for yourself. Don't forget the KELCHNERSSS

I also happen to love Jewish cats, so I got really excited for this photo:

I just found this on google. I wanted to share the laughs.   

Also, because I like matzoh and the village people and my fellow tribe members:

From L to R, Stacy M (honorary), Lyndsey F, Jesse R (he's always the center of attention), Leah S., Eleni B. (Also honorary, she's Greek which is completely more fabulous) and Scott F (my dad)  



Thursday, April 14, 2011

Kate Spade

Good Morning Darlings (again!),

This time of year, what with the birds chirping and the cool mornings and hot afternoons always reminds me of working at Kate Spade on Newbury. Now, don't get me wrong, I have loved KS since I was a wee one, but my time working at the boutique was just incredible because I met so many incredible women. We all loathed our boss, so we had that in common, but we also all wished for the time when women dressed to leave the house (as I write this, I am sitting in ripped jeans, a bleach stained tee, and sambas), and when people took time to eat a meal. We all loved working with each other and oohing and ahhing when new products came in. We bought each other coffee, rubbed each others backs when we were having rough days, and went out for drinks after work at little bistros. We talked old Kate, Liberty of London (BEFORE target reinvented it), our favourite china patterns and our mutual love of Calypso ( sales. The girls at KS were such a wonderful group and around this time of year, I miss them all sooo much. So in honour of them, I am going to find my favourite KS picks for the spring summer!

"Postcard Bangle" $128

This, IMHO, is the mosts perfect piece of summer jewelry. You kind of feel like you are sitting on the beach in Atlantic City c. 1921. If I wasn't about to embark on a longish trip to europe/israel/moving, I would probably break down and buy this. But if one of you is not traveling or moving, please buy it and let me wear it sometimes. 

"Kissing Frogs Belt" $125
I cannot help myself. I have an addiction to all things animal and bedazzled. I have a tiger bracelet, a fox head ring, and I think that this would be the perfect addition...Although I have to say that Kenneth Jay Lane used to design jewels for KS, way back when before LCI came into the picture. And I think that LCI may be overstepping their boundaries a little bit with this one. It could totally be a KJL, if he were to start making belts. So I'm of two minds in this case. But it doesn't change the fact that it is insanely fabulous.

"Tropica Jocelyn" $325

Oh. My. Bjork. What an amazing bag. This shape is actually fabulous  because you can wear it as a clutch or as a wrist bag. This is an insane situation and you could really wear it with anything and everything. Buy it now. 

There are so many good things to be had from KS this year. Go check it out! Everything is just so beautiful. 



Good Morning Darlings,

You know how I always say that I love to learn new things? Well I think it's about time for me to learn how to ride a bike, so that I can buy this one:

Does anyone have the patience to teach a sassy, stubborn, twenty five year old Jewish American Princess how to ride a bike?

I'll buy you a gimlet.


Monday, April 11, 2011

She's a predator posing as a house plant.

I am ready to simplify my life. 
I want to learn how to make cheese and jam and soap. 
I want to be the best wife that I can be. 
And I want to do it all while maintaining perfectly manicured nails.


Thursday, April 7, 2011

Packing for a weekend trip in the age of global warming.

Good Morning darlings,

First of all, I just have to say that I was taken aback by all of the positivity and love that was thrown my way yesterday. It was amazing and really made my day.

Flying away for the weekend is so glam, sometimes I just cannot handle my jetset lifestyle.

Something else that makes my day is going to New England tomorrow. I am so excited to see so many of the people who are so important to me in one place. Boston and Maine. So I'll be in Boston for a few hours tomorrow and I get to see one of my former campers who is now a fabulous grownup living in my old hood in Beantown. I'm excited to see her and hit up my favourite old coffee shop (Espresso Royale, In college, I spent many hours reading, writing, and people watching there. It's strange, every time I go back to Boston and go into ERC, I see someone I know....from college, highschool, whatever. It is really the ONLY place in Boston to get decent bagels, and they have everything whole wheat bagels, which makes my heart pitterpatter.

AND THEN we are going to wagamama, which for those of you who don't know...GO NOW. It is this amazing noodle bar with communal seating. The food is so amazing and they have a juice bar. The only problem is that the juice is served warm, which is kind of disgusting. But I still drink it. I don't know why. It's always so tempting and delicious looking and I always order one and it's always warm, but then I decide that since I paid $5 for it, I should probably drink it for the vitamins sake. But beside the juice situation, they have great food. AND it's in the pru RIGHT NEXT TO SAKS. So that's a plus for my wardrobe, but a minus for my Saks card / house-buying potential.

This is what I will have to use all of my selfcontrol to not buy tomorrow. Can you even stand them?!!?

AND THEN I am meeting my old roomies and we are driving up to Maine  -- rural Maine for a baby shower!!! It's so exciting when your friends have babies because then you are off the hook for a while longer. Anyway this womb will not be carrying a baby any time least not until this central nervous system learns how to control the hand to wallet to cashier motion. I mean, that IS something you learn in your twenties, right? But the baby mama and papa are two of the most amazing people in the whole wide world and will make the absolute best parents. AND I really REALLY REALLY Mean it. Like, completely more than anything. So going to their baby shower is just going to be fabulous. AND I mean, it's a barbeque. So it's even better.

We were a 'perfect poker hand' for a P party. Nicky is only half in the picture. Blargh.

AND did I mention that lots of my besties are going to be there? And we are going to have a wonderful time? And reminisce and look to the future and make silly plans and sing along to songs that we all know and love and stay up too late and laugh and cry and have so much fun that none of us will want to go home and will probably go through some sort of post-maine depression.

Anyway, the big situation is that I'm flying and refuse to check my bag (I'm going for 36 hours). I checked the weather and it is going to be 61 degrees in Maine on Saturday. But really, I am guessing it will feel closer to 49 or something. But who knows? It could snow. The last time I was in Maine in April, it was two months before my wedding in 2008 and there were 7 foot snow banks on the ground. I was about to get a little bridezilla, but I restrained. But I refuse to bring boots. Why?


I don't wear boots in April, I wear cute satin flats in April. But I don't want to ruin them. So it's a dilemma of epic proportions.

I'm wearing a dress to the shower. And I'm going to bear my legs. But I feel like pumps are more appropriate for the weather than peep toes, which is what I would normally do in April. Also, I should probably bring my uggs, cause we all know how cold it is going to get at night. And if we go out in Portland, I can't really be dressed up because that's just not really what people do. So I need jeans. And chucks probably. And a blazer, which I'm obviously going to wear on the plane anyway. So yes. Plane outfit.

My dress. It's my fave.

My friends used to make fun of me for getting dressed to go to the airport. But I always said, "you never know who you are going to run into at the airport," which probably holds true for LAX and JFK but probably not Philadelphia International.

So I will wear stovepipe indigo jeans, fuschia tb's (I would wear wedges, but I have to navigate the t when i get to boston), a schoolboy blazer, and probably the big tumi bag. OH and of course my traveling sunglasses, which are huge and black and really just block everyone else from seeing me cry when the plane takes off...Oh yea, I'm that girl.

But also the whole liquid situation is crazy when you aren't checking a bag. It's like come on guys. I have so many potions and lotions that I can't really do without especially when going to a different atmosphere.

Like how about my morrocan oil for my hair, my argan oil for my skin, my nivea creme for my hands, my nivea lotion for my body, my shampoo, my conditioner, my chanel...Well I guess you get the point. Traveling is such a P in the A these days.

But that of course is not even close to how amazing it will be to see my ladies.



Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Fashion lives inside of me

Good Morning Darlings,

Do you want to know what is so strange? Sometimes I get down on myself for enjoying the things that I enjoy. Sometimes I truly believe that all of my hobbies are silly and girlish and that maybe I should grow up and enjoy hobbies such as, well I don't know, birdwatching or something.

You know sometimes people make me feel bad for being the way that I am and I have to tell you that I think it is not very nice and I also have to tell you that it is just dawning on me that I should make no apologies for who I am.

It's not that I like to eat and wear clothing. It's about so much more than that. It's about the process, the ideals, and the growth of the mind while doing these things. I'm not a dumb girl, I graduated from college magna cum laude with a freaking 3.8 GPA. I love to read. I love to write. And I can read and write about things that aren't so "superficial," but those are the things that I happen to really love.

In fact, if I could make a living writing about fashion and food and creating and cooking and dining and designing, I would drop everything and make that happen.

For a long time I really wanted to go to law school, I wanted to be a trial lawyer and prosecute the bad guys. Growing up, people used to tell me what a great lawyer I would be and even now, my ridiculous persuasion skills get me further than most. And for a while, I felt really guilty and sad about not having the funds or the state of mind to go to law school. But now I kind of realize that all I wanted was for people to take me seriously.

I guess what I mean to say is that I can't help what I am passionate about. I live to learn about new cooking techniques, new ingredients available to me, new designers, and well yes, new Bravo shows. And really I shouldn't feel bad about that. I should enjoy what I enjoy and let others enjoy what they enjoy. I am happy to share my passions and sarcasm tinted life with you and I would hope that if we ever meet and hang out, you would do the same for me.

So today here are the things I'm passionate about:

1. A new beginning
2. A slicked back, but very bushy ponytail (which I'm rocking today out of laziness, but WOOHOO it looks great)
3. A simple weekend in Maine turning into a "OMG what do I pack situation," (tune in tomorrow for that blog)
4. White anchovies. I can eat them by the pound. If you live in Spain, please send them to me.

Now, darlings, what are your passions? Do you ever feel under appreciated for your loves?